My cup runneth over

So, I went to my barre workout class this morning. I turned my phone back on afterward and I had a missed call from the agency.  This is a dreaded moment for any adoptive parent.  What if I can't get back in touch with them today?  What if they are on the phone and I have to wait for 5 minutes for a return call?  What if the whole deal is RUINED because my phone was on silent for 55 minutes?  I did not even wait to exit the building before I was dialing the only number I have memorized since 1992.  I was directly connected to our Colombia social worker...........And we are approved for our Little One!  OUR Little One.

Tears, questions, whispered prayers and more tears immediately began flowing.  I called family.  I rushed to Brant's work to tell him the news before he got the email with our official referral.  We cried and smiled.  God has answered our prayers again.  He is so gracious.  I'll give you a look back at all that has transpired since my last post.

The best way to describe my feelings about recent weeks is anxious.  I am not by nature a worrier.  I tend to just let things happen as they may.  Never struggled much with that.  Until now.  Now, I have a little girl I'm trying to bring home from another continent.  A daughter who is sick and I cannot get updates on.  Overwhelmingly anxious.

I found out during these weeks that ICBF will not continue to cover Little One's medical costs once we obtain custody of her even though we are not "officially" her parents yet.  That means she would be without health insurance a large portion of our time in Colombia since we would not yet have an adoption decree.  This is not an issue for adoptions with shorter in-country stays.  But the insurance company says they can only back date 30 days from the date of the adoption decree (which we will receive in the 7th or 8th week of the stay).  With her health this could be financially detrimental for us. We prayed and I hounded called everyone I could think of to ask questions.  I finally spoke to an insurance coordinator who said they would research the special circumstances.  As a result, I was able to get in writing that we could also use the date of the permission to adopt that is granted to us by USCIS.  This is a HUGE relief.  She will be covered the entire time!

I was also notified by our agency that Little One's region had requested our dossier to begin their review process.  But further on in the conversation, I realized they were talking to me about a different region than she was living in previously.  That led to all kinds of scenarios in my mind.  Has her health changed?  Was she moved to another foster family's home?  Did something happen to her foster family?  I felt sick.  I prayed and prayed.  After three weeks of over-thinking and creating outlandish scenarios, I found out she has been in the same city and region the whole time.  There was just a communication error.

Communication is always difficult in international adoption.  We have asked so many questions about Little One and gotten not one answer.  That is hard.   I am just craving some sort of updated information.  The last medical updates I have for her were from October 2012.  I know that she spent 3 weeks in the hospital in September 2012.  After that, nothing.  Our agency and in-country representative have asked the questions.  We just aren't getting answers.  So, we continue to pray for her health.  The Lord created her tiny body and I know he can protect her while I cannot.

Here is what we are anticipating the timeline to be:

In the next 1-2 weeks we will receive her entire file in both Spanish and English.  I am hopeful we will receive updated medicals and pictures.  I know she has grown so much since our only picture of her at 14 months old.

In the meantime, I will begin filling out the immigration forms (I-800, I-800 supplement 1 and 864W) required by the US for our family to specifically adopt Little One.  After submittal, the USCIS approval typically takes 30 days.  From that point, it will take another 1-2 weeks to receive the final approval from the US Embassy in Colombia.  Once we receive that approval, we will schedule our travel!  Looks like a good estimate would be toward the end of October.  There is so much to do between now and then.  Please be praying for our family that we will be efficient in all we have to do as well as loving and patient with each other during the busyness.

As I have stated in another blog post, I am not allowed to share any identifying information with you about Little One.  So, I am scrambling the face of her picture to give you a "sneak-peek" without revealing too much.  She has captured our family's hearts and I cannot wait to smother her with a thousand kisses.

How abundant are the good things that you have stored up for those who fear you, that you
bestow in the sight of all, on those who take refuge in you. Psalm 31:19

Tax deductible donations may be made at Adopt Together by credit card, check or Paypal.

More fundraising and more waiting

Disclaimer:  This will be a hodge podge of information.  Try to follow along.

Adoption Process
Since I last blogged, we received some great news!  On July 9th, I called Lifeline and found out they had received a verbal, provisional approval of our dossier.  The "verbal, provisional" part means we do not have anything official in writing, yet :(  The dossier approval part means we are approved to adopt in Colombia :)  And we are still waiting on that official letter.  After we receive it, the next step is to be approved specifically for Little One.  The region where she lives does this approval.  It is handled as a completely separate process than ICBF approving us as an adoptive family for Colombia.  This could be happening as we speak, or they could be waiting on our paperwork.  There are still a ton of unanswered questions about where we are in that process.  But I have learned that international adoption and the Colombian culture love to leave me in suspense.  And I'm almost learning to accept that.

Fundraising
On July 20th, we held our 2nd and FINAL yard sale.  We raised another $3,300 which brings our yard sale total alone to $8,500!!  I never would have thought.  Here is the money breakdown:

Money spent out of pocket:   $13,669
Money raised:                        $15,707
Total:                                     $29,376

Our estimated expenses are going to be $33,000 - $38,000.  That leaves a deficit of $3,624 - $8,624.  But we are SO much closer to our goal than before!!

Although the yard sales are over, we are still planning a couple of other smaller scale events to try and raise the additional funds. In the meantime, if you would like to make a donation, you can do so by clicking the AdoptTogether button on the right side of the page.

Frequent Flyer Miles
To significantly reduce our travel costs, we are also asking those who have extra Delta SkyMiles to spread the love our way!  The portions of the flights we will be taking with Delta will cost over $4,800.  This is a HUGE chunk of the remaining amount we need to raise.  So if you have miles to spare, please click the link in the right column.  My SkyMiles number is included for the transfer.  You must transfer a minimum of 1,000 miles and there is a maximum of 30,000 miles per transaction.  The transaction fee for the transfer is $30.00.  Multiple transactions can be made, but no more than 150,000 miles can be transferred per calendar year.  It will take us approximately 500,000 SkyMiles for the trip.

Timeline
According to our agency, their families have been traveling on the average 10 weeks after dossier approval.  What?  "Ten weeks" sounds Way a Lot Closer (as Reese says) than "sometime in October".  So, manically getting a few things in order so I can manically focus on other things closer to the travel date.  So excited!  More excited than the exclamation points can convey!!!

Exhaustion Level
High.  Just thought I would throw that in there.

My Heart
Last week as I finished up the translation of over 75 pages of social and medical history for Little One, I became overwhelmed emotionally. I read the words of the agency describing the day she was voluntarily brought in and turned over to them at 6 months old.  I felt the heaviness of her mother's heart at not being able to care for her and her medical needs.  I visualized her tears and shaking hands. I saw her crying in her bed that night at the unfairness of it all.  I momentarily felt her anguish.  And I can't shake it.  See, I was not the one created to be her Mommy.  I do not believe that God gave Little One to her mother with the intent of later ripping the mother's heart out and presenting it to me in a tidy package.  Yes, I will become her Mommy.  And I will love her as fiercely and deeply as the children I bore.  But I will always make sure she knows that we are both her real mommy.  The one who gave her life, but because of this world and its disparity, could not provide for her.  And me.  The mommy called to fill the void created.   I do not take this lightly.  I pray for her first mother every single day.  And I pray that when I'm not enough, the Lord will take over and do what only He can.  Please pray with me for Little One, her birth mother as well as her foster mother.  Pray that God meets them right where they are offering peace and love and that their hearts will be open to receiving His complete healing.

Love as always.

During the Waiting Comes Confirmation

The Wait:

Our dossier was submitted to Colombia since my last post.  The submittal date was June 4th.  So we have officially arrived at the part of the adoption process where the agonizing waiting begins. We are trying to keep busy with other things.  No shortage of those anyway!  We are doing fundraising including yard sales, bracelet sales, Thirty-One bag sales.  I will sell anything at this point!  So thankful for the amazing turnout for the yard sale.  We had over $5,000 in sales.  Beyond blessed.

Dakota and I worked at the VBS our church, Willowbrook Baptist, hosted.  Gavin and Reese both attended.  This was Reese's first year.  They are still happily singing the songs from their week.

We also had some vacation time with the kids as the agency really recommends filling up the kiddos love tanks during this interim period.  It was a much appreciated 5 days of relaxation.  Or maybe 3 days when you deduct the 2 travel days that were NOT relaxing :)  But, overall, a good trip.

This week I'm catching up on paperwork that I never manage to get done during the school year.  Taxes (you heard me right), filing, prepping curriculum for the new school year.   Maybe I can squeeze in some freezer meal prep??  Spend the night parties, pool time at Nannie's and closet clean out.  It is a mad dash of activity before we start back to school on July 8th. Yes, July 8th.  Since we will be gone for possibly two months to Colombia, we must make up some of that time by doing school in July and August.  Too hot for much else anyway.

Adoption Update:

The day after we submitted our letter of intent for Little One, we were presented with the full integral report on her.  We are still waiting on an updated medical, but this did provide us with much more information than we had originally received.  Except, it was in Spanish.  Then we found out, we would be responsible for having those 75 pages worth of documents translated into English to submit to USCIS.  So what do I do when I need help?  I send out a panicked Facebook plea!

A friend of mine, Wendy Johnson, mentioned she has a Colombian friend who lives RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER FROM ME!!!  What?  So began a sweet friendship with Diana Prue who, although busy with 3 children under 6 and approaching her 3rd trimester of her fourth pregnancy, gladly jumped in to assist me with the translation.  Not only that, but she has worked at the yard sale, hosted our family in her home for an amazing Colombian meal and volunteered to work with Dakota on Spanish lessons. And just when I was already feeling overwhelmed by the Lord's provision, it got better!  At the yard sale, Diana met Brant for the first time.  When she got home that evening, she sent me this message:

I was thinking I've seen your husband before, and then I told my husband that I thought he was a fireman from what you said in your blog, and then it hit me!  I met your husband before!!!! We took a tour of the fire dept in spring 2012... he was so nice to the kids!!! I even sent a thank you card with a picture!!!!

Here are those pictures.

God was working all this out a very long time ago.  Colombian adoption is exactly where we are supposed to be.  Every time I feel uncertain, He sends me exactly what I need.  Whether a scripture, words of encouragement from a friend or confirmation in strange ways like this.

                           Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written 
                                        in your book before one of them came to be.  Psalm 139:16


Continue to pray for us as we wait to hear back from ICBF and as we continue our fundraising efforts.  As always, we love you all!!!

Tax deductible donations may be made at Adopt Together by credit card, check or Paypal.

We are expecting! It's a.........

We are expecting!  It is a precious 2 year old little girl! We are overwhelmed with excitement!  Yesterday, Brant and I submitted to our agency our official Letter of Intent to adopt the sweet baby I mentioned in a previous blog post.  We will refer to her as "Little One" throughout the rest of the posts until we are officially matched.  According to Colombia's privacy laws, no identifying information may be posted online.  So...no pictures, no real name.

Now, we just wait.  Lots.of.waiting.  Lots.  Our dossier is still being translated to Spanish by one of Colombia's official translators.  We are hoping that will be completed next week so it can be combined with the letter of intent to submit to ICBF (Colombia's department of family welfare).  From there we anticipate hearing a, "YES, of course we approve you!" from ICBF within 4-8 weeks.  Another 2-4 weeks to officially match us to Little One.  Then 2 more weeks to receive her referral file.  Two more weeks for translation into English.  Then we begin some more, yes more, approvals on the U.S. side of things.  My best estimate for travel is November-ish if there are not additional delays.

The summary report we were given on Little One a few weeks ago was very basic.  And very old.  It was last updated in March 2012.  Our social worker contacted ICBF to point that out.  Their answer was, "You are right, that is outdated.  Unacceptable."  And then nothing.  Although they agreed it needed updating, they did not give us an update.  So, we have agreed to pay for a medical report if they will just provide it.  We have committed either way, but would like to prepare ourselves a bit for what lies ahead.  According to her report, Little One has Sickle Cell Anemia.  There are varying degrees of Sickle Cell.  The terminology and some of the information we have received point to the most difficult type.  It is a lifelong battle with little hope of a cure.  The goal will be management of the disease as best we can.  It should seem daunting.  I've done the homework.  For weeks, I've studied this disease and its effects.  It should be overwhelming.  But I have such a peace.  Little One belongs with us.  We are her family.  The waiting has become exponentially more difficult now that we have "met" her.  I wake up during the night only to remember that she isn't home yet.  And I pray for her.  I never stop praying.  For her safety, her health, her foster family, her birthmother.

So here are my prayer requests:

• That our dossier is approved by ICBF quickly.  
• That they approve us specifically for Little One. 
• Her safety and medical care.
• That her health is better than our worst case scenario.  

Thank you for your support!

Tax deductible donations may be made at Adopt Together by credit card, check or Paypal.

The Apparent Project

**Update (5/5/13): All the bracelets pictured below plus 100 more have sold!  I am hoping to post some more pictures in the next couple of days.  I'll send out a link when I do.  Thank you!



I have blogged before about adoption NOT being the solution to the orphan crisis.  It is a very small piece of the puzzle.  One of the most important ways to beginning working toward homes for these children is to help families stay families!  So, I am partnering with The Apparent Project, an organization helping Haitian families stay together.  Poverty, disease, political instability, natural disasters, and personal stresses divide families every day.  Poverty is the primary reason that there are millions of children in orphanages in Haiti and throughout the world.  The Apparent Project is responding to these needs by building homes, teaching marketable artisan skills and responding to the emergency needs of Haiti's poor in Port Au Prince.

We are beginning a bracelet fundraiser.  Part of the proceeds from the bracelets go back to Haiti and the other part goes to our adoption fund.  The bracelets are made by Haitian artists who are attempting to just meet the basic needs of their families.  They recycle cereal boxes to make these unique beads.  No two bracelets are the same.  These are a perfect gift for Mother's Day!  

If you would like a bracelet, please comment with the number(s) of the bracelet you would like to buy.  Or you can send me an email at eleshamdm@gmail.com.  Each bracelet is $8, and I can ship up to 6 bracelets for $2.50.  If you need larger quantities, I have plenty of other bracelets available.  

Thank you so much for supporting Haiti and for supporting our adoption!



# 1 by Makenson - SOLD

#2 by Vanessa - SOLD

#3 by Luciana - SOLD

#4 by Catrine - SOLD

#5 by Blondina - SOLD

#6 by Berline - SOLD

#7 by Joseph - SOLD

#8 by Samy - SOLD

#9 by Roody - SOLD

#10 by Annie - SOLD

#11 by Janne - SOLD

#12 by Shedline - SOLD

#13 by Masseline - SOLD

#14 by Nancy - SOLD

#15 by Belle - SOLD

#16 by Kaliko - SOLD

#17 by Amanda - SOLD

#18 by Lorene - SOLD

#19 by Marise - SOLD

#20 by Patrick - SOLD

Provision

I just want to thank all of you who have donated so far! We have raised $2090 through donations and the pre-sale of some yard sale items we did not have the space to store. This is such a sweet blessing to us. I am especially overwhelmed by another couple who are in the adoption process who chose to donate to OUR adoption. You know who you are and it is so evident that The Lord has led you to have a special love for ALL of his children and not just your own. Thank you for that obedience. I know The Lord will continue to bless your own process!

I also need to take just a second and brag a bit on God's provision in our lives. For those of you less familiar with our family personally, my husband Brant is a firefighter and works for a family business when he isn't at the station. I stay home and homeschool our children. The family business is  seasonal (lawn and garden equipment sales and repair). This winter things were particularly slow and Brant worked without pay for 4 months. Worry isn't something with which I typically struggle. But when Brant told me in December what was about to happen, I'm pretty sure I had a near panic attack. What are you doing, Lord? We are being obedient to you! How are we going to pay for our basic living expenses, much less these adoption expenses??  But then I relaxed and fell back into my normal routine of prayer and expectancy that God would provide. And let me tell you, he did indeed!! From August until now, our family has personally paid almost $11,000 in adoption expenses. And our savings account has the EXACT SAME BALANCE as before the expenses. This is with no change in spending and Brant's loss of income. There is no mathematical way that we should have been able to write those checks. But I have learned that God has funny math. He has provided in so many ways during each and every step of our journey so far. Why did I ever doubt?

Tax deductible donations may be made at Adopt Together by credit card, check or Paypal account.

So many decisions. Prayers needed.

Last week we received a call from our agency about a waiting child.  They called to let us know that the agency had been assigned a new file from Colombia.  They wanted us to be aware of the file even though it did not fit the requests we had on our request form (remember that one I told you I had a LOT of trouble completing.)

Our request and the file could not be any more different.  This file was not siblings, just one child.  Not boys.  Instead, a precious little girl.  Not a mild, medically correctable special need.  But a life long, non-correctable, serious need.  And we are praying.  We discussed the possibility for a day before agreeing to view the file.  I did not want to hold this child up from being presented to another family if we were not willing to seriously consider the placement.

The file was fairly basic in nature. It talked about her history and how she entered the system in Colombia.  Her date of birth and age.  Brief medical history.  Region where she lives.  Current living arrangements.  And a picture.  And what a picture it is.  She is strikingly beautiful and sweet.  Our hearts melted a bit, I have to admit.  But if you know anything about us, you know we are realists.  Not dreamers.  So realism required us to contact a friend of ours who is a pediatrician here in town.  We discussed at length the potential implications of this condition both short and long term as well as financially.  We have requested additional medical information from Colombia.  There are no guarantees that we will get this information, but it never hurts to ask.

And now, we pray.  Please pray with us.  Pray for this precious child (who by the way is just 19 days younger than Reese!!)  We need the Lord's wisdom and guidance these next few days.  Love you all!!!


Tax deductible donations may be made at Adopt Together by credit card, check or Paypal account.