While we were attending the informational meeting at the agency, Brant expressed to me an interest in Colombia. I believe he also re-expressed this on the way home. Probably making sure I was really listening! He had no real reason, just something about it appealed to him during the meeting. It was one of the countries already in the hat, so that did not rock my boat too much.
As we began studying the resources the agency provided us, the decision process involved quite a bit of natural elimination. Here are some of the things we had to consider:
- We could only choose from countries in which our agency has a working relationship. Those include Bulgaria, China, Colombia, Congo, Costa Rica, Dominican Republic, Ethiopia, Haiti, Hungary, Peru, Poland, Taiwan, Uganda and Ukraine. We are thrilled with our agency and so that narrowed us down to 14 potential countries.
- Our existing family. We have 4 children already. That prevents us from entering Haiti's program. They allow a maximum of 2 children in the home before the adoption.
- The amount of time required in-country to finalize the adoption. We decided on a maximum of 12 weeks although we would really love to keep that much shorter. Brant can take 12 weeks of FMLA through the fire department. The Dominican Republic can require a stay as long as 18 weeks. Definitely eliminates us.
- Availability of children under 2-3 years of age. With our agency the following countries primarily place older, waiting children or children with medical needs more significant that we are prepared to deal with given our existing family size: Bulgaria, Costa Rica, Hungary, Poland, Taiwan & Ukraine.
- Safety of travel. If the stay in the country we adopt from is more than 1-2 weeks, we will be taking our children with us. So safety is huge for us. Now mind you, this is all relative. But for us, Congo was immediately out.
- The next big eliminator was something that we both agreed we wanted. To adopt more than one child. Possibly a sibling group. When we expressed that desire to our agency social worker, she narrowed it down very quickly for us to China or Colombia. The other countries either do not allow placement of two children at once to a family or they do not keep sibling groups together.
So many of the decisions were actually taken from us as we expressed our desires in the adoption process. During this elimination process, I began to become very interested in the Colombia program as well. As I discussed options with the agency, scoured the internet and prayed, I became more and more convinced this was the avenue we should pursue. Brant was already there. Just took me a while!
In China, we would receive two unrelated special needs children. In Colombia, we would most likely be referred a sibling group of two where one has a mild, medically correctable special need. Our focus ages are two children with the oldest not being older than 5 and the youngest being under 3 but preferably under 2. We feel that maintaining the birth order of our two oldest is crucial and do not want that disrupted. Brant and I both know we will receive the referral the Lord has for us. That might not fit our initial "ideal" scenario. Although I don't know that 4 children under 5 is exactly ideal either :) Our only real plan is flexibility and that patience word again.
Colombia! I'm already imagining their precious, little (pequeños) faces. See that Rosetta Stone is really paying off!
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